Saturday, July 28, 2007

Say It With Flowers

“I don’t believe it.”

Harold skimmed the remainder of the letter and waved it at Jasfoup.

“What’s up?” the demon asked. “Have they cancelled your subscription to the butt-ugly dating agency?”

“What?” Harold’s forehead creased. “No. This is from the Lawn Bowling Federation. I’ve been banned.”

“For what?” Jasfoup stood up and read the letter over his shoulder. “Complaints have been made? By whom?”

“It’ll be that Mrs. Redd,” said Harold. “I was the only one to criticise her taking over Laverstone Bowling Club.”

“I thought it was her husband that ran it?”

“Ostensibly yes,” said Harold, “but he does whatever she tells him to. He takes his husbandly duties very seriously.”

“Ugh.” Jasfoup held up his hand and turned away. “I don’t need to know any more.”

“Sorry.” Harold looked at the letter again. “She claims that I’ve insulted her by suggesting that it’s her that runs the place, so she demanded that everybody send me to Coventry and bar me from playing.”

“Thus proving your point, yes?”

“Exactly.” Harold laughed. “That’s ironic.”

“So you’ve been banned from the bowling club?”

“Unofficially, yes, and there’s a move to ban me from every other club in the country, including the ones run by the Crown Green Association.”

“She can’t do that, surely? What about all your friends in the club.”

“Ah.” Harold sighed. “There’s the crux of the matter. Mr. Redd has stated he’ll disband the whole club if I return. I can’t allow my friends to suffer because she has a problem with me.”

“It’s a tough one.” Jasfoup patted him on the back. “Just a month away from your championship match, too.”

“I think that’s rather the point, isn’t it?” said Harold. “Stop me achieving something I wanted.”

“Send her an orchid,” said Jasfoup.

“Good idea.” Harold smiled. “Everybody loves orchids and she might reconsider.”

“Exactly,” said the demon. “There’s one in the potting shed all ready to go. Her name’s Audrey.”

© Rachel Green 2007
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1 comment:

neil h said...

As ever, Jasfoup gets straight to the heart of the matter ... :-)