Tuesday, April 29, 2008

...And I Feel Fine

“Stop, Harold.”

Jasfoup plucked the aerosol can from unresisting fingers, inspected it briefly, then threw it into the recycling box.

Harold watched it all with a single raised eyebrow.* “What did I do?” he asked. “Why can’t I use air freshener? It’s a CFC-free can.”

“That’s not the point, old chap.” Jasfoup steepled his fingers. “The point is that you were using a chemically manufactured scent which has a deleterious effect on the well-being of the household.”

“I beg to differ.” Harold walked back to the kitchen with the demon following. “I think it more likely that people will object to the smell of the curry I ate last night.”

“You should use pot pourri instead,” said the demon. “Or incense sticks.”

“I suppose.” Harold picked up his tea. “Why do you care, anyway? I’ve never met an ecology party demon before.”

“I care about the world, Harold,” said his friend. “The longer the world survives, the more souls go to Hell.”

“That’s the official line,” said Harold. “What’s the real reason?”

Jasfoup winked. “The faster the earth dies, the sooner the apocalypse. After that we all go to Heaven, and Heaven is dull.”

*It took him three months of almost constant practice after the first time he saw Leonard Nimoy do it on television.

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