“There were times,” said Gillian, looking out of the bedroom window, “when a Vampire Queen would look out of her castle and tremble at the sight of an angry mob of villagers armed with torches and pitchforks come to burn the castle down. If you were really unlucky, they’d have hired a Helsing Inc. employee and brought along the crossbows and woodsaws.” She jiggled the baby into one arm and made a sawing motion against her neck. Lucy giggled.
Gillian pulled the curtain back a fraction and looked down to the driveway where a figure was illuminated by the light from the open door. “Now,” she said, “we are terrorized by the vicar selling raffle tickets.”