Thursday, March 25, 2010

And I Don't have to Wear Speedos

Jasfoup surveyed the damage. It was, technically, a minor explosion but it had taken off the boy's right hand and leg, and both his testacles. He leaned down and pressed a finger to the boy's neck. Alive but in shock and Jasfoup could already hear footsteps coming up the stairs. The lad would survive.

"Am...am I dead?"

"Nope." Jasfoup used a stylus to tick off a box on his smartphone. "You were really lucky. I don't even want to know why you had an M80 flash grenade up your bum."

"It wasn't..." The lad squeezed his eyes shut in pain. "If I'm not dead, why are you here? I thought the devil only came for the dead?"

Jasfoup tutted. "First, I'm a demon, not a devil and second, I have a part time job as a lifeguard."

"Lifeguard?"

"Yes. I visit stupid people and tell them to get out of the gene pool." He put his phone back in his pocket. "But I see you've done that for me."




True Story: 2009 Darwin Award: Muffled Explosion

8 comments:

Mens swimwear said...

and whays wrong with speedos?

mens swimwear

Leatherdykeuk said...

Ha! The link is so appropriate I'll leave the spam :)

aims said...

And to think it came from a true story. Boy - some people are just incredibly dumb! How sad.

Leatherdykeuk said...

I love the Darwin Awards :)

martha said...

That's a right proper Splurf!!! Wot an idiot!

Leatherdykeuk said...

heh! He was. Thanks Martha.

stephanie said...

*laughs*

Most excellent.

Leatherdykeuk said...

Thank you :)