Monday, September 27, 2010

Project Proposal

The smell was worse than when Dill had failed a skateboard stunt and landed in a dog poo bin. "Oh my god!" he covered what remained of his nose with his hand. "What is that?"

"My experiment." Sam twitched off the cloth covering what Dill had assumed was a fish tank, revealing the true horror inside. "I reanimated them all."

Dill had to dare himself to go closer. Inside the tank an undead squirrel limped across a surface of dried mud. What parts of its body weren't being attacked by a grey funguus were home to a number of insects. Cockroaches clustered around a pair of small birds and formed a scaled spinal exoskeleton while butterflies and other insects festooned its tail. Its movement was hampered by the beginning of a wasp nest on one leg. He looked aghast at Sam. "Why? For god's sake, Sam, why?"

Sam covered the tank again. The paisley patterned cloth reminded Dill of his grandmother's budgie cage, and he suddenly realised why the two birds on the squirrel's back looked familiar.

Sam handed him a report sheet. "The process works. Reanimated creatures no longer function as individuals but as hive creatures. Think of the military applications."

"What military applications?"

"Think of a whole army of soldiers functioning as a hive."

Dill shook his head. "What would be the point? Why would you even consider creating such an abominaton?"

Sam picked up another sheet of paper, this time with the heading 'Ministry of Defence.' "Look at the funding advance."

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Sunday, September 19, 2010

The Eyes have It

Dill jumped as consciousness flooded back his eye, already open, filled with the view of a familiar figure strapped to an operating table. "Sam?" The figure spoke. "What have you done?"

"Relax, mate. It's just a bit of an experiment." Sam appeared in Dill's field of vision, or at least his back did as he headed toward the figure on the table. He peeled back the figures eyelids and clamped them open, then used forceps to fish out the optical nerve. Dill felt pressure on his head.

"Wait! That's me you're working on. How can I see you if I'm over there?"

"I took your eyes out."

"You did what?"

"Relax. You'll get them back when I'm finished. Besides, they're in a nutrient bath. They'll be better than before."

"I don't believe you, You're mad."

"They said that about Frankenstein. And Crippin."

"But they were mad."

Sam shrugged. "The exception proves the rule?"

"What are you doing?"

"Fixing a camera into your socket and connecting it to your optical nerve. If this works it'll be the first step to a true cyborg technology. We'll be rich."

"How rich?"

"Moderately rich."

The figure nodded, making the clamps rattle. "Fair enough."

Tuesday, September 07, 2010

A Smile on Your Purchase

The house at 22 Murder Drive, Infamy was very cheap. Well below market value, in fact; the main factor in Gerry being able to afford the mortgage. "Why are there no other houses on the estate sold?" he asked the vendor, John Smiles*.

"Yours is the show home." John clapped him on the back and clipped the end from a cigar. "Fully furnished, fully fitted kitchen. Ten percent cash deposit and you can move in."

"Fantastic." Gerry took a brief walk around the small garden. "What's this mound?"

"Ambiance." John pointed. "Have you seen the view? Marvellous fields and a quirky post-modern building in the mid ground."

"That's a cemetery and crematorium."

"There you go. And not a penny extra on the price."





*Smiles Estate Agents, 20 Dark Passage, Laverstone